Kings
by Love's to blame
Summary: Alice and Jasper want some alone time but their friends won't leave so they play a game of kings to get them drunk
1. Chapter 1

Some people play Kings with beer but I play with vodka so, so will they

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The second the door to the kitchen closed Alice turned to Jasper. "they need to go" she whispered.

They referred to their friends who were currently watching movies in their living room.

"you're the one who invited them over here" Jasper reminded her

"for dinner not for a movie night" she wrapped her arms around his waist and stared up at him with wide eyes "I was planning on spending the night in bed with you"

"we need to get them to leave" Jasper declared.

alice smiled mischievously and she went on the cupboard. "let's get them drunk and send them off to the guest rooms one by one" she suggested as she pulled out a bottle of vodka.

"we're gonna need more then that" he told her "and how to you expect this plan to work? You're a lightweight"

"not if I take small sips" she winked.

Jasper shook his head as he reached for the snacks they were supposed to be getting.

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The rules of Kings are simple:

Place an empty cup and a deck of cards in the middle of the table. Then have the players sit in a circle around the table, this will be the order in which the cards are drawn (in this story they're gonna be sitting in order from favorite character to least, go vote at my poll). For every card there is a different rule.

King card: the first three people who pull a king card in the deck must pour some of their drink into the cup in the middle of the table, this is known as the king cup. The fourth king has to drink whatever is in the cup.

2: two for you, a person of your choice has to take two drinks

3: three for me, player takes three drinks.

4: four for whores: all ladies must take a drink

5: slap, all players have to hit the table with their hand, last person takes a drink.

6: six is dicks, all guys must take a drink

7: thumbmaster, whoever pulls a 7 becomes the new Thumbmaster. He or she can sneakily put their thumb on the table whenever they like. All the other players must put theirs on the table, too. The last to do it must drink. If their is a new thumbmaster drawn before the first has had a chance to raise their thumb then oh well that sucks for them, they lost their chance.

8: I never (who doesn't know how to play this?) you say never have I ever done this and all those who have done it take a drink.

9: first player says a word then the next person says something that ryhmes. This continues until someone fails to make a rhyme or a word is repeated. Whoever loses has to take a drink.

10: Category, player chooses a category. Each player must choose something within that category. If you can't think of anything, you drink. (Example: chocolate candy bars: Snickers, Twix, Reese's Cups, Milky Way, etc.)

Jack- Rule, When you pull a rule card, you get to make up a rule for the game. Every time the rule is broken, that person must drink. The rule only lasts until the deck of cards are reshuffled.

Queen: (the internet has a rule that's so different from mine, mine is funnier and its my story so...) player asks the next player a question which they cannot answer instead they must ask the next person a question. Whoever answers or fumbles must take a drink.

Ace: waterfall (who doesn't know what a waterfall is?) The player who picked the Ace starts the waterfall. No player can stop drinking until the player before him stops

each person has their one tolerance level. I have randomly decided on how many cups of straight alcohol they can take before they're drunk (15 sips per cup)

Alice- 4 cups(based off of me, keep in mind that she is cheating so a sip for her is really like 1/2 of one for everyone else)

Jasper- 5 1/2 cups

Bella- 3 1/2 cups

Rosalie 5 cups

Emmett-6 cups

Edward 5 1/2 cups

Carlisle 5 cups

Esme- 4 cups

Victoria 5 cups

James- 6 cups

I will draw cards as I write this so there is no possible way for anyone to know who wins. Also I will roll a dice to see who loses each game. 


	2. Chapter 2

I changed the sips in the cups to from 15 to 10 sip And I can't find any dice besides I don't have any eight sided dice so I get to pick who loses what game. There's going to be a pattern and whoever figures out the pattern first gets a sneak peek of the latest chapter...every chapter will have its own pattern. Due to a small math error this chapter does have a pattern...my major is Film not math.

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Alice placed a bottle of vodka in the middle of the dining room table. next to it she put a red plastic cup. She turned to her friends "Who wants to play kings?" she asked.

"I'm first" Emmett yelled as he walked over to the table and sat directly in front of the vodka.

Rosalie rolled her eyes at his eagerness, but sat down next to him.

Jasper came into the room shuffling a deck of cards, he grinned at Alice and sat next to his sister.

Alice finished setting up the alcohol and sat down on Jasper's lap.

"Do I have to play?" Bella asked.

Edward took her hand "Yes you do, lightweight" he sat down next to Alice and Bella took the chair next to him.

Victoria turned off the movie and waltzed over to the table "We haven't played this game in forever."

"That's because last time Bella got drunk and decided to go puke in the sink." James said sitting down next to his fiancé.

Bella blushed at her step brothers words.

"At least she's not the one who went skinny dipping." Carlisle teased, as he sat down next to Emmett 

"Let's stop talking about last time and create new memories." Alice suggested as Esme took her seat between James and Carlisle thus completing the circle.

"Hurry up and pour the drinks!" Emmett demanded as he placed a hand on top of the cards.

A few minutes later everyone had a cup full of their favorite drink and Emmett pulled the first card."Seven." he said and laid it down.

Rosalie picked up the next card. "Seven," she turned to Emmett "Sorry babe, you're no longer thumbmaster."

Emmett pouted.

Rosalie kissed him and held up her thumb. One by one everyone held up their thumbs, the last being....Emmett.

"You lose" Rosalie teased.

"Woman..." Emmett mumbled and took a sip.

Jasper placed a five down on the table and slapped it.

Alice followed, then Edward, Victoria, Bella, Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, Esme, and lastly James.

"Damn." he grumbled as he took his sip.

Alice pulled a jack "Okay my rule is that everyone has to take a drink whenever someone's phone makes a sound. Doesn't matter if its a text, call, or email"

Edward quickly reached for his phone.

"Leave it on" Alice ordered

Edward nodded and put it back in his pocket before picking up his card. Eight. "Okay never have I ever had sex in my parents bedroom."

Bella blushed and took a sip. drinking with her were Edward, James, Victoria, and Jasper.

Bella stared at James in shock. "So, we both had sex in the same place?"

James nodded "I'm just as disgusted as you are."

Rosalie turned to Alice. "Why didn't you sip?"

She grinned "It was your parents bed not mine."

Rosalie shook her head lightly "That's just so wrong on so many levels. The parents bed should be sacred and untouched by the children."

Jasper shrugged "I would have thought you and Emmett would have already been there with your sexual habits."

Rosalie just turned to Bella "Let's just keep going."

Bella picked up a three and took that many sips.

Victoria pulled a six and all of the guys took a drink.

James picked an ace. Grinning wickedly he began drinking. Esme followed then Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, Edward, Bella, and Victoria.

He continued drinking for a few seconds. Bella began to hit the table letting him know she couldn't take anymore. James smirked and continued drinking until his cup was empty. One by one everyone stopped drinking. The only one left with anything inside their cup was Alice.

"You're cheating!" Emmett accused once he saw her half full cup.

She shook her head "I'm drinking. Just not as much as you are."

Emmett rolled his eyes "That's still cheating..." he mumbled.

They paused the game shortly so that everyone could refill their cups.

Esme pulled a four and all of the girls took a drink Carlisle pulled another four and all of the girls groaned as they took another shot.

As the second spin around the circle began everyone except Alice began to feel a small buzz thanks to James' waterfall. After all too much alcohol too quickly can make anyone quite tipsy.

Emmett drew his second card and got a six. All of the guys took another sip.

Rosalie smirked as she pulled a queen. she turned to Jasper. "Is it true you used to play with dolls?"

Jasper rolled his eyes and turned to Alice. "Why are you so hot?"

She grinned knowing that Jasper was taking it easy in her. Alice turned to Edward "So, how big is your Dick?"

Edward turned to Bella then quickly turned back to Alice "What?" She pointed to his cup "Drink." He nodded and did just that.

Jasper put down a nine. "Cat"

Alice smirked, "Bat"

"Sat" Edward said.

"Mat" Bella shrugged.

"Fat"  Victoria said quickly.

"Gnat" James said without a second thought.

"Hat" Esme smiled

 "Brat" Carlisle said 

"Shit!" Emmett exclaimed, "There's nothing else." he picked up his cup and took a sip.

"What about flat?" Rosalie asked him.

"I forgot about that" he lied.

Rosalie saw right through him "You're trying to get drunk aren't you?" He nodded and tipped his cup. "Free alcohol." he whispered. Alice pulled an eight. "Never have I ever," she paused and thought for a moment "kissed a member of the same sex.

Edward, Emmett, Rosalie and Victoria all took a sip.

"Let me guess its was with each other" Carlisle said, and the four drinking nodded.

"When?" Bella asked Edward.

"It was about two years ago. Me and Emmett got wasted and accidentally wandered into a gay bar. Guys started hitting on us and we pretended we were a couple. Unfortunately they made us kiss." he held his head down in shame.

"It was just a peck I swear!" Emmett told Rosalie.

She ran a hand through his curls soothingly "Its okay Em." 

He let out a deep breath in relief. "So, you and Victoria?"

"We were thirteen and practiced kissing on each other."

"So you're the one who taught my girl how to do that thing with her tongue?" James asked Rosalie.

"No that was Laurant." Victoria told him. 

James stared at her in shock.

"I'm kidding."

"Thank God." he muttered.

Edward reached for a card just as his phone began to ring, signaling a text. He quickly turned it off.

"Everyone drink!" Alice ordered as she reached for her cup. 

Edward pulled a two and turned to Alice with an evil grin, "Two for you."

She groaned, but took two small sips.

Bella put down a two and all of the girls took a sip.

Victoria pulled an eight. "Never have I ever got caught having sex in public." 

Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Carlisle, and Esme all drank to that.

Bella gasped "Esme?"

Esme blushed "Let's just say that wasn't one of my finer moments."

Carlisle placed an arm around her, "Charlie never did look at us the same."

James pulled the last eight in that round. "Never have I ever had sex in public."

"That's what Victoria just said." Bella told him.

James shook his head "Hers was if you got caught. Mine is sex in public period."

Bella groaned and took a sip. She was not alone, everyone joined her. 

"The prudes had sex in public?" Alice asked, looking at Bella and Edward.

"Guess we're not prudes." Edward told her.

Alice shook her head "No, you're still a prude." 

Esme for the first king of the game and poured a small amount of her drink into the king's cup.

Carlisle pulled a nine. He smirked. "Gracious" 

Emmett grinned. "Spacious"

"Anxious" Rosalie said quickly.

"Captious" Jasper said then whispered into Alice's ear.

She grinned "Specious"

Edward just picked up his cup and took a sip. He then looked at Jasper "You cheated. You gave her a word"

Jasper shrugged "You would've done the same for Bella."

The third spin around the table began when Emmett pulled a six and all of the guys took a drink.

 Rosalie drew the second king and poured a little of her drink into the kings cup.

Jasper got a ten and began the first round of category for the game. "Wonka candy" 

"Fun dips" Alice gave Jasper a small smile that hinted something naughty. 

"Wonka bars" Edward said.

Bella grinned "Nerds"

"Gobstoppers" Victoria said. 

"Pixie stixs?" James questioned.

"Those are made by wonka." Victoria told him.

"Laffy taffy" Esme answered.

Carlisle paused for half a second "Shock tarts"

"Is there anything left?" Emmett asked as he reached for his cup.

Alice pulled another ten "Swimming strokes" she said naming the category.

"There's only four." Jasper told her."I know" she whispered.

Jasper nodded, once he realized what she was doing.

"Butterfly" Edward said with a grin as he thought of his favorite stroke.

Bella shrugged "Backstroke"

"Breaststroke" Victoria said.

"Does it look like i'm a swimmer?" James asked as he picked up his cup.

"You could have said freestyle" Carlisle told him.

James just shrugged "Doesn't matter now"

Edward pulled an Ace and started a waterfall. He was followed by Bella then Victoria, James, Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, and finally Alice. He drank only six sips before stopping.

Everyone stopped in the order that they started.

Bella pulled the last six and the guys took a drink.

Victoria drew a nine "Rhyme" she said for the rhyme.

James put an arm around her waist "Mine"

"Time"

"Fine"

"Line"

"Sign"

"Nine"

"Lime"

"Can I just take a drink?" Edward asked.

Victoria rolled her eyes "Go ahead"

 James pulled a five and slapped his hand down on the table. He was followed by Victoria, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Edward, Rosalie, Carlisle, Esme then...Bella.

"You okay Bells?" Alice asked, as Bells took a sip.

 The brunette nodded "Just a little tipsy"

Esme pulled a jack and thought of a rule. "Okay, first person to puke has to take a shot."

"Why? So they can puke more?" Bella asked.

Esme nodded.

"Wow, you're mean." Emmett told her.

Esme nodded once more, "The alcohol does that to me."

Carlisle got an ace and began a short waterfall of only four sips.

Emmett drew the third jack "Whoever says a word with a vowel has to take a drink."

Rosalie rolled her eyes "Every word in the dictionary has a vowel"

"Okay, then everyone has to take a drink whenever we go around the table." Emmett said.

Rosalie nodded her approval and reached for a card. Ten, category. "Designers"

"Prada"

"Gucci" Alice squealed.

"Dior"

"Chanel

""Coach"

"Guess"

"Do Manolo Blahniks count?" James asked Rosalie.

She nodded.

"Stella McCartney"

"Zac Posen"

Emmett shrugged and took a drink.

Jasper pulled a five and slapped the table. He was soon followed by Alice, then Victoria, Emmett, Rosalie, Edward, Carlisle, Esme and finally...James.

"How come its always me?" James asked as he picked up his cup.

Alice drew the third king and put a nice sized amount into the king cup.

Edward pulled a six and began a waterfall of only five sips.

Bella got the unlucky fourth king and drank from kings cup. She grimaced at the taste of Rosalie's tequila, Alice's vodka, and Esme's hynotiq combined.

Victoria pulled a queen and turned to James. "What would you say if I told you I was pregnant?"

James turned to Esme "When are you going to leave Carlisle for me?"

"Would you rather have a fall or spring wedding?

""Why an I pussywhipped?"

Emmett held back his laughter and turned to Rosalie "Why are you so beautiful?"

"Why can't you satisfy Alice?"

"Can I kill my sister?"

Alive smirked at Edward "Why?" was all she said."

That's not question." he told her.

"Yes it is." she argued. 

Edward rolled his eyes but took a drink anyways.

James pulled a two. "Carlisle" he said naming his victim.

Victoria pulled a nine. it was time for another rhyme. "Sane"

"Cane"

"Flame"

"Tame"

"Same"

"Came"

"Name"

"Game"

"Lame"

"Mane"

Another round began. "Fame" Victoria said 

"Pain"

"Rain"

"Chain"

Emmett thought for a second "Aww fuck." he said taking a drink.

James pulled a three and took three sips.

Esme also pulled a three and took three sips.

Carlisle got a seven and was now thumbmaster.

Everyone took a drink as they started to go around the table again.

Emmett drew a two. "Alice" he said choosing the person who had to drink.

Alice glared at him as she took her two sips.

Rosalie pulled a four and all of the girls went for their cups.

Jasper drew a ten. "Rent characters."

"Dude, you're an undercover homo." Emmett muttered.

Alice ignored him "Mimi"

"Roger"

"Mark"

James shrugged "Why do you keep picking shit I don't know?" he asked as he reached for his cup.

Alice pulled a queen and Edward grabbed his cup.

"I already know that in gonna lose" he told her.

Edward drew a seven and Carlisle missed his chance at thumbmaster.

Bella pulled a two and took two shots.

Victoria got a jack "Every time someone cusses they have to take a shot"

James pulled a three. "Bella" he said, picking his stepsister as his victim.

Esme pulled a five and lightly hit the table.

She was followed by Carlisle, Rosalie, Jasper, Emmett, Alice, Victoria, James, Bella, then Edward.

Edward took a sip from his cup and held up his thumb. Everyone copied him, the last to do so was Emmett.

As Emmett took a drink, Jasper shuffled the cards and Ariel went to bed.

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I will post the tally next chapter 


	3. Chapter 3

**Just a small teaser chapter...go to my profile and vote at my poll so i can finish this chapter...**

Tally:

Emmett: 3 ½ cups

Rosalie: 3.3 cups

Jasper: 3 cups

Alice: 1.7 cups

Edward: 3 ½ cups

Bella 3.3 cups

Victoria: 3 cups

James: 3 ½ cups

Esme 3.3 cups

Carlisle 3.2 cups

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Alice waited until Jasper put the cars back in the center of the table before she leaned back on him. "Everyone's getting tipsy" she murmured as she watched Esme sway slightly.

Jasper nodded "Me included"

Alice frowned "I feel left out"

Jasper picked up her cup and handed it to her "Well then drink like a big girl, everyone is sure to pass out before us"

Alice nodded and took a sip "Okay" **(Alice is now going to drink regular sips)**

Carlisle started off the new deck by picking up a card. Four. **(Ladies drink) **All the girls took their sips.

Emmett drew a king and poured a sip into the king's cup.

Rosalie pulled a nine **(rhyme) **"map"

"Tap" jasper said

"Sap" Alice rhymed

"Nap" Edward said

"Slap" Bella slurred

"Cap" Victoria said

"Yap" James rhymed

"Gap" Esme said then giggled.

Carlise put an arm around Esme "Flap"

"Dap" Emmett said quickly

Rosalie rolled her eyes "Bap"

"Clap" Jasper clapped and smiled.

"Snap" Alice rhymed

"Rap" Edward said

"Wrap" Bella slurred and hicupped.

Victoria tapped her nails on the table as she tried to think of a word.

"Your taking to long" Alice told her "Just take your drink"

Victoria nodded and did as she said.

Jasper reached for his card and got a two. **(Two for you) **he thought for a moment before deciding who he would pick to drink "Bella" he said finally, settling on the person who was almost drunk.

Bella reached for her cup and took two sips. She clumsily set it down and it tipped over.

"GET THE CARDS" Emmett yelled as he quickly picked up the cards.

Rosalie rolled her eyes at her husband's panicking.

Edward calmly got up and went into the kitchen. He came back out with a few paper towels and a dishrag. He quickly cleaned up the spill before picking up Bella's cup "I think you've had enough"

"No I haven't" she argued.

"You're cut off" Edward told her firmly.

Bella glared at him. "Either give me back my drink or prepare to be celibate for the rest of your life because I will never fuck you again"

Emmett fell into hysterics as Edward quickly gave Bella her cup back.

"Are you guys done yet?" Alice asked as she put a hand on the deck.

Edward nodded "Go on"

Alice pulled her card. King. She poured some of her drink into the king's cup

Edward pulled a five **(slap)**, while he was distracted Bella quickly drowned the rest of her cup.

**(Bella- 4 cups)**

Edward slapped the table. He was followed by Alice, Victoria, James, Jasper, Rosalie, Esme then Bella. Emmett was too busy laughing as Bella slowly hit the table, first with her hand and then with her head.

"Take a drink" Edward told the loser as he tried to get Bella to sit up.

"Time for someone to go to bed" Victoria teased.

Bella slowly looked up "But I'm not tired"

Edward took away her cup again "You're done playing" he told her.

She nodded "Doesn't matter anyway" she muttered "I'm fucked up"

"One down, six to go" Alice whispered to Jasper.

Victoria reached for her card. King. She poured a little of her drink into the kings cup and made a face. "I feel sorry for whoever has to drink that" she commented as she looked as the repulsing brown liquid.

James drew a nine. **(Rhyme) **"Star" he said.

"Car" Esme said quickly then laughed for no apparent reason.

Carlisle chuckled before saying "Mar"

"Far"

"Tar"

"Jar"

"Bar"

"Par"

"Is that a word?" James asked.

"It's a golf term" Edward explained.

James nodded "okay"

"Hey James" Alice called to get his attention.

James turned to her "What?"

"You messed up so you have to drink"

"Damn" he muttered as he reached for his cup.

Esme pulled her card, a five, at the same time Bella quickly sat up.

"I have to puke" Bella announced as she put a hand over her mouth.

"GO TO THE BATHROOM" Alice yelled.

Bella nodded and got up. She went out the first door she saw.

"That's not the bathroom" Alice called after her "That's the patio"

"At least it's not the sink" James said.

Alice nodded in agreement "That was so fucking disgusting"

Edward frowned "you're not the one who had to dig out the puke with your bare hands"

"Well she is your girlfriend" Jasper told him.

"And speaking of your girlfriend shouldn't you go help Bella" Victoria suggested,

Edward quickly got up to check on Bella.

Esme slapped her hand down on the table and Carlisle quickly followed. At almost the same time everyone realized that she drew a five and slapped their hands down.

Seconds later Edward entered the dining room carrying Bella bridal style "I'm just going to put her on the couch" he informed them. When he sat back down at the table he noticed that all eyes were on them.

"What?" he asked.

"Where did Bella puke?" Alice questioned "oh and you have to take a drink since you were last to hit the table"

Edward took a sip of his drink. "In your rose bushes" he told her with a smirk.

Jasper quickly covered Alice's mouth so that she wouldn't yell. "It'll be fine" he told her "we'll just hose them down in the morning"

"I already did it" Edward told him.

Jasper took his hand away from Alice's mouth "See everything's okay"

She quickly turned to him. "I doubt my roses will grow anymore. They'll probably die unless vomit works as a fertilizer"

Jasper shrugged "I guess they're just going to die"

Alice crossed her arms and huffed "Someone draw the next card" she demanded.

Carlisle drew a three and took three sips. Esme leaned against him and put her head on his shoulder.

"Are you getting sleepy?" he asked.

She nodded "my head is heavy" she mumbled as the alcohol began to get to her.

"Are you finished?" Carlisle asked as he reached for his cup.

Esme slapped his hand "Don't even think about it" she told him.

He quickly withdrew his hand and nodded "yes dear"

Emmett pulled an eight. **(I never)** "Never have I ever walked in on my parents"

Jasper and Victoria both reached for their cups.

"Worse moment of my entire life" Victoria said as she took a sip.

"Please refrain from sharing any details" Alice told her two unlucky friends.

"I just have one question" Rosalie said looking at Jasper "was that before or after you and Alice got busy in their bed?"

Jasper rolled his eyes "after" he muttered.

Rosalie nodded and reached for her card. "Do the old rules still apply?" she asked no one in particular as she put the jack in the discard pile.

Alice shook her head "no, you start over with every deck because basically it's a new game"

Rosalie nodded "okay then I'm stealing Emmett's rule but editing it a bit. For every round you have to take a drink" she told Alice,

Alice groaned as jasper reached for his card.

He put down his two and pointed to Rosalie "take two sips" he told her as revenge for her choosing Alice.


End file.
